I’m Too Sexy For My Shirt (or not)

by Penelope Smallbone

Lately I have been feeling distinctly un-sexy. Now, none of you can actually see me, so there’s no way for you to know if this is a legit feeling. But I will tell you that I am normally a VERY confident girl who actually loves my body. I know it’s far from perfect by anybody’s standards, but it’s all I’ve got so I have to make it work, right?

This brings me back to my recent feeling of non-sexiness. Despite my confident attitude, I haven’t been laid in over three months. That’s a long time for me. As my friend recently pointed out, I’ve had plenty of opportunities to do so and I’ve turned each one down. (silent cheer — good for me! I didn’t sell myself short and sleep with the first thing that moves my way, etc, ok ok, I feel good about that part…) I’m starting to wonder if it is the very act of having sex that makes one feel sex-y in the first place. Or is it the converse? Feeling confident and sexy in your own skin makes you more attractive and sexually appealing and therefore you will want to have sex to fulfill some sort of manifest destiny put forth by your body.

Okay so I probably already know the answer to that one. We hear time and again that a confident attitude can be more attractive than any feature on a girl’s body. So why am I feeling so blah lately? Maybe it’s the winter/beer pudge growing on my belly. Maybe it’s the fact that the weather is shitty and I haven’t been going outside as much. Maybe it’s because my nails are brittle and breaking from the dry weather. Maybe I’m too into my book on the subway… Stressed? Busy? Who knows. All I know is that I need to shake this feeling because if this girl doesn’t get some soon, it could be bad. I’m already starting to get bitter…

As far as sex making you feel sexy? Yes. Of course it does! Who doesn’t love that little moment of reinforcement where you say, “Hmm. Sex feels GREAT. And I’m kinda good at this…! And look, he wants to help me out too! Hooray!” But maybe that’s just me.