Change Will Do You Good

by Jane Moneypenny

Fortune Cookies

My last three fortune cookies have been strangely accurate.

Two years of a poisonious environment. Five months of desperately applying to every job possible. One very failed interview in February. Three companies popping out of nowhere.

One beautiful amazing job offer that will get me out of this abusive place that has turned into something that I’m not.

Last Thursday afternoon, I had a horrible annual review with my boss and the previously mentioned Cranky Bully. People said some ridiculous untrue things about me (“I caught her hiding from the project managers once to avoid work”) and some very true things (“she’s ver negative”). The latter part of the statements hit me hard; I didn’t deny them, but I’ve realized (from talking to former co-workers) that this place was so bad for me that I’ve become this person I didn’t recognize. Any job beforehand, whether I hated it or not, I would still smile and do the work (“Rainbows and sunshine! That’s what you are!” said a former co-worker). But at this place, Cranky Bully and the environment has turned me into a resentful scared negative employee.

When I got the official offer Friday morning, I almost yelled “FREEDOM!” throughout the office. My boss and his boss took it incredibly well and were happy for me, understanding that I just couldn’t flourish here. The job couldn’t be more perfect for my next move. I’ll no longer be in traditional advertising as I’m going client-side. No more billable hours, no more inane client changes. Of course, every company has the same B.S., but it’s a perfect change for me as I look more into working on user experience design. The most exciting part is a 18% raise to finally be paid what I deserve AND four glorious weeks of vacation (I have been suffering with two weeks for the last four years).

So what now? I do what I can these last two weeks to at least leave with a decent reputation and then I have a wonderful week off. My parents are itching to take a family vacation to Canada, but I would rather go to Nicaragua or spend time in NOLA and then visiting friends throughout the country.

Whatever the case, change is coming. My therapist said I just need to have the faith; I was already doing everything I could to change life.  Looks like my resolutions for 2012 are doing quite well!

“‎The problem, often not discovered until late in life, is that when you look for things in life like love, meaning, motivation, it implies they are sitting behind a tree or under a rock. The most successful people in life recognize, that in life they create their own love, they manufacture their own meaning, they generate their own motivation.” — Neil deGrasse Tyson